This past twelve months with Amelia has gone by so quickly. The tiny little bub I held in my arms has changed so much. Babyhood truelly goes by in such a flash. I now look at my little girl and see the changes beginning to take place as she becomes a toddler. She isn't walking yet although I believe she could if she had the courage. Im in no hurry though, life is busy enough chasing two kids without another one getting away from me.
This time around I have evolved again as a mother. I am still breast feeding Amelia, the longest I have ever fed. I also carry Amelia alot more than I did with the other two. Again this has just naturally evolved out of necessity. This time around I purchased a didymos wrap and have worn her on my front as a natural part of the day when out and about. I just purchased an Ergo and have started wearing her on my back. Wearing her is so important because her sisters need my constant attention to keep them safe and feeling loved. I might not be able to give my full attention to Amelia alot of the time but she is content as she is getting cuddled. She also gets to watch her sisters at play from a safe place.
I love watching the special relationships she is developing with her sisters. Chloe adores her, carrys her constantly and is always looking out for her. In return Amelia loves her, seeks her out when she is upset or if she wants something. The relationship between Elyssa and Amelia is different again. They are slowly becoming playmates. It's fun watching Elyssa try and find ways to play with Amelia. She currently likes crawling around the floor, trying to get Amelia to chase her.
Ben and I are alot more relaxed this time too. Amelia sleeps half the night in her cot which is next to our bed, then usually wakes around eleven and cries which is my cue to come to bed. She then says 'hello' her most used word, has a feed and wriggles into my arms for a cuddle. After a while she usually wriggles across the Bed so she is sleeping between our pillows. Sometimes during the night she wriggles back over to me for more cuddles.
She is an easy going child but when something upsets her or if she wants something she will let you know very loudly. I adore my tiny little Amelia. At thirteen months she is only 8.1kg and 73cm long. I look forward to watching her grow and change over the next twelve months.
I'm back, it has been just over twelve months since my last post. Since then we have moved house and been run off our feet with our three gorgeous, delightful, funny girls. Life is never dull at the house of pink and it is definitely never quiet! Amelia has celebrated her first birthday and elyssa is about to turn three! Chloe started school this year and she loves it more than life itself. I love watching her little idea of the world expand as she soaks up new information like a sponge eager to learn.
Personally for myself it has not been the greatest year to date. A few months ago we learnt the devastating news that my older brother has cancer. His prognosis is good and he is coping as best as he can with the plate he has been dealt. He is half way through his treatment and it seems it is working and the tumor in his chest and back has started to shrink.
My own health has been thrown a bit of a curve ball as I have started down the track towards a possible diagnosis of multiple sclerosis. I have waited all year to have an MRI which was now completed the other day. I don't know the results yet and I'm hoping to find out this week. I have a strong sense that it is not going to be clear and that I do have MS. I keep telling myself that knowing isn't going to make any difference to my life as if I do have the disorder I have had it for the past seven years, possibly longer. I have often had nerve issues and struggled to keep up an exercise program due to always finding myself in pain. After Chloe's birth I noticed my right foot going progressively numb over a period of a month or so. Back then the two doctors I saw felt it might be to do with the epidural I had.
I decided to get on with life and over time my brain stopped recognizing that my foot was permanently asleep. It still moved ok, it was just the skin that was numb. After Elyssas birth I felt the now familiar pain in my knee that marked the beginning of my left foot going numb. This time I didnt seek any advice, I just figured it was one of those weird Shell things. It wasn't until after Amelia's birth that I realized I had a problem. As I walked out of hospital with my beautiful, tiny new bub I felt that same painful sensation I got before my feet went numb but this time it was in my thumb. Within days my hand started to go numb. This time I was concerned because I had decided my back was probably causing the foot numbness because of pregnancy. I couldn't think of any logical reason why my hand would go numb.
I barely had time to think about this new realization before I was swept back up in the familiar yet terrifying newborn baby wave. I resurfaced once when Amelia was about 6 weeks old to ask the local GP in passing about my numbness. He suggested seeing a neurologist. I declined much to his shock saying I was too busy. He gave me a disapproving look but didn't comment any further. By the time I arrived home I was immediately swept back up into the life of mothering three little children five and under and didn't think any more about it. Over the next six months I barely noticed my other hand go numb or the fact that I seemed unable to tell with my arms and hands if water was hot and cold.
six months ago as life was starting to settle down I did start to take a bit more notice as a small part of my face had started to get that familiar numb feeling. I consulted dr google who informed me over and over again that there was a high possibility that I might have MS. This was the first time I had considered it. Friends had mentioned it to me but I always laughed it off explaining that they didn't understand, I'm just weird.
So I pulled my head out of the sand and dragged myself kicking and screaming to the GPs. Since then I have seen two GPs, a general specialist and a neurologist that specializes in MS. The neurologist has sent me for the MRI I had yesterday and now I wait for news...
The important thing is if I do have MS it is not the end of the world. you do not survive MS, you manage It and live with the condition. It doesn't shorten your life and most people don't end up in a wheel chair. I'm not going to spend any time at all thinking about what lies for me in the future because there is no point. I could spend the next ten years in a deep, dark depression, wondering what my life is going to be like when I start to really deteriorate but the reality is I might just be wasting my time. I honestly believe a cure for MS and other related conditions is not far away. So much progress has already been made. I would rather take each day as it comes and not look too far ahead. Enjoy the wonderful life I have with my girls and wonderful husband, living our happy life.
After a week of feeling unwell with high BP, protein and a migraine I made it to my ceaser date, 38 weeks pregnant. I arrived at 7am, had a catheter and a drip inserted (lovely) . I needed the drip inserted because they like to give you two litres of fluid before a ceaser so that the spinal doesnt make your BP drop too much. Anyway, my protein at this point was over 2 plus so it was definitly time to have bub, I don't think I could have held out any longer, my body couldnt cope being pregnant anymore. The drip hurt going in and the midwife said 'don't worry, its the most pain you will feel today'. This became a funny joke later.
I was really nervous about getting the spinal because I felt it go in last time and Ben nearly fainted because of the way I screamed. He chose, with my blessing, to stay out of theatre for this bit. I felt no sensation at all this time when it was inserted and was surprised and happy when my legs started to go numb. The theatre staff helped me lie on the table and Ben arrived. We were both feeling really good although I was still slightly terrified.
The Docs all arrived and the surgery started. I started to feel a bit of nausea which I expected because it happened last time too. The doc put some anti nausea medicine in my drip and I waited, expecting to feel better but then it got alot worse. I started to feel really unwell and experienced extreme pain in my neck. It is hard to explain what it felt like but I think I was probably about to go unconcious. I wouldnt lie still and was screaming and vomitting. I kept trying to sit up and was causing the staff alot of grief because they couldnt get a blood pressure reading because I wouldnt keep my arm still. I was yelling that I wanted them to get the baby out and make me better and asking why my neck hurt so much. They kept putting an oxygen mask on me but I kept pulling it off because I needed to spew and it made me feel worse. I was about to ask them to give me a general and Ben said they were about to give me one when the aneithitist managed to fix the problem and I became stable again. I was really shaken up though and a long way from a 'happy about to have a baby' place. The meds might have sedated me a bit too.
Then my gorgeous Amelia was born and I managed a smile and after she was checked I was gla to see her in Bens arms which is where she stayed for about three hours. I had a quick cuddle but really wasnt in a good place to be welcoming my new daughter into the world. In recovery the nurse asked if I wanted to feed her and to my shock I said no. I knew she was safe with Ben and I wanted the first feed to be a special moment and I just wasnt up to it. The theatre staff sat with me and de briefed about what happened. They think my kidneys might not have been functioning properly and the two litres of fluid I was given didnt protect me from a massive blood pressure drop. My BP went from 160/100 to 60/ something in about three minutes. They have no idea why my neck hurt and it still does.
After a couple of hours back in my room the nurse came in and weighed Milly (5 lb 14oz, 46 cm long) and dressed her and thats when the hormones kicked in for me. Suddenly I was yelling at Ben to get the camera and kept saying she was tiny and cute. After she was dressed I gave her the first feed and I am so glad I waited because it was amazing. She latched straight away and I just couldnt take my eyes off her. Since then she has fed and fed and is gaining weight so quickly. She is just divine! Im still glad I got my tubes tied though and if I was to ever get pregnant again I would have a ceaser with a general. That was trully the worst experience of my life.
I figure lots of people have bad birth stories and many people struggle to get past it. I refuse to do that, I got a beautiful daughter out of it, the experience is over, the memory can't be changed and it will never happen again so Im moving on from it and Im just going to enjoy my beautiful daughters. I have had two amazing births and one I would rather forget but the end result was the same, another wonderful child to love and nurture.
I am 31 weeks pregnant and as usual I have found pregnancy to be quite demanding physically, mentally and emotionally. I know I shouldn't complain because it really hasn't been that bad, it could have been alot worse, and I will have a lovely little bub in 7 weeks time but I swear my body wasn't made to grow babies. I usually get to about 20 weeks and problems start to crop up, like high blood pressure, painful contractions, exhaustion etc but this time none of that has happened until I hit 28 weeks. My previous two pregnancies have ended with pre eclampsia and I have been forced to have my babies right on 37 weeks. This one is headed the same way but Im coping ok and hoping for the best. Im resting alot and trying to keep on top of it emotionally as well as health wise and Im counting down to the ceaser that I am likely to have at 38 weeks.
Up until the past couple of weeks I have felt completely exhausted and drained of all energy and motivation but the past couple of weeks its like I have turned into the energizer bunny which I have decided must be my nesting instincts kicking in. I am completely focused on getting this house organised and ready for not only the baby but also so that the house can keep kicking along while I have and recover from my ceaser.
So far we have moved Chloe downstairs to her own room. In order to do this we had to move my sewing room :( back upstairs into our bedroom. The office also had to come out of the room and has been moved into the main living area. Chloes room is looking really nice, I just have to hang up her pictures and things and it will be done. The nursery upstairs is a huge bedroom so the baby and Elyssa (20 months) will share. Elyssa has moved from her cot to Chloes old toddler bed and the cot has been moved to make room for some furniture that will be coming in June. I have washed all the baby clothes, wraps, blankets etc and put them in tubs waiting for the furniture. A basinette will go in our room for the first few months and Im also getting a rocker for feeding this time which I am really looking forward too, I have always wanted one.
The pram has arrived, a second hand Phil and Teds which is fantastic and I am buying a second hand car seat. I have also been doing a bit of baby sewing, I have made 16 triangular shaped pre-fold nappies and I have knitted a wool cover to go over the top. If I get time I think Ill do another couple. Im also going to find the time to sew a sun shade for the car seat and two fleece foot muffs for the pram.
So...I am feeling just about ready but it really does feel like the calm before the storm! A newborn as adorable as they are will throw life around here into chaos for at least a few months but the advantage of having my third baby is that I know that is going to happen, I know that it will all fall back into place and that as hard as it is a new life is so wonderful and amazing and I will be trying to cherish every minute because this is definitly my last bub. I can't wait to meet her!
I have been wanting to make one of these for a while because they are a quick and easy project. Yesterday we decided to take the kids to the park but it started raining on the way and ended up in Warrnambool so I dropped into Spotlight. They had a sale on Flanalette so I decided to stock up. I made do with what they had though for this quilt, there wasn't a very big range. Ideally I would have only used two or three prints and then used solid colours but there was heaps of prints and hardly any suitable solid colours left so I just sort of grabbed a range of prints in different sizes and colours.
I made the quilt for my new little bub that is likely to arrive late June and Im glad I did it for her. The squares did take a while to cut out, a couple of hours, the total sewing time was about two to three hours but it didnt help that the thread in my machine kept snapping. I should have invested in some better quality cotton. The seam snipping would have taken forever except I bought myself a pair of little scissors with a spring that made the job really quick, probably about 30 minutes, so overall a very quick and easy project! I didnt use any batting though, I just kept it more as a throw over quilt that can be used in the cot or on the floor as a rug and as she gets bigger its the perfect size for snuggling up on the couch in front of the TV.
I used a few different tutorials to figure out the best way to make it, if you want to have a try THIS is a good one. She doesn't quilt the squares though like I did.
Im going to make a few more of these as I have lots of friends having babies in the next few months. I might try a quilting shop though for some more flanalette options though.
With the left over fabric from the quilt I made I am going to make a Bunting for the nursery to hang on the wall above the cot. That will be in my next post.
First of all I have to apologise for not blogging for so long, I struggle with pregnancy and although this pregnancy is going really well, keeping up with blogging was just a bit much. I also have been a bit slack with my crafting and gardening this year for the same reason so there hasnt been much to report. Ill do a gardening post in the next couple of weeks and I do have a few catch up knitting and sewing posts to do before this bub comes. Ive just hit the third trimester and now I am really feeling it physically and I still have a ways to go!
Now, what got me back to my sewing machine the past week was a desire to sew some pants for my pre schooler that actually fit her. She is short but skinny and doesn't really have a waist or hips. I found this hipster, slim fitting pants pattern over at http://indietutes.blogspot.com/ . This is the pattern . The description was exactly what I was after. Chloe is very picky about her pants, they cant be too long, sit on her belly or be too restrictive or she just wont wear them. They can't look like boys pants either and if she can wear them with a dress or pinafore thats even better. I wanted to make some pants that could fit easily into her boots as well so that the bottom of her pants don't get wet as we walk rain, hail or shine to get to kinder, daycare and playgroup. Ok, maybe not hail.
Being tired and feeling heavy and big I decided just to whip up a few pairs from the fabric stash but once I got started I decided I needed to fancy them up a bit or the chances are she wont wear them. Plus whats the point of making them if you can't get a bit creative, right?
The first pair I made was from a pair of adult sized cords from the op shop. My machine struggled to sew the thicker material, I broke about 4 needles. Eventually I caught on I might need a different sized needle so I bought one, then my cheap thread kept snapping. I kept going though and I am happy with the results, although the waist band is a bit dodgy. I appliqued some hearts on it out of the same material. I left the edges of the hearts raw so that they will start to fray a little bit after a few washes. Chloe loves them.
The next couple of pairs were alot easier to make because the cord was thinner. I did some applique on one pair and added some owl ribbon to the other pair. This girlied them up a bit for her.
I am a temporary stay at home mum, on leave from a teaching career and loving every minute of it. I have a beautiful 6 year old daughter, Chloe, a gorgeous 3 year old, Elyssa, and a 1 year old, Amelia. All three are the light of my life and I feel truly blessed to have had them. I have a loving husband Ben who is my best friend and confident whom I love dearly. I trully think i am the luckiest person on the planet! I love my life and everything about it.